August 7, 2011

Wow, I've been really MIA from my blog for a while now. Honestly it started back when Rex got sick on our camping trip in Sequoia National Park. Ever since then I've been having a really hard time keeping up with anything...work, house work, pretty much anything thing that I was doing regularly. Seems like the only thing that could hold my attention for any amount of time has been running and even that has fallen to the way side in the the last two weeks.

So here's the update and let me warn you it isn't pretty in any way. A week and a half ago I had a panic attack on my way home from work. It was so bad that I had to pull over and call Hubbs to come and get me because I couldn't drive. It was brought on by a combination of having to take a couple of days off of running (it was how I was managing my stress), stress from my job and the stress of losing my current position (I don't do well when you take away my control over my own life). It was crazy.

I ended up taking the last week and a half off of work for stress. It was part my decision to be off and part my boss being super supportive and reminding me that my life is more important then any job. I love my boss. She's great but she can also be a big source of my stress at work too. I don't want to bash her because for the most part she is a great boss. My job is a lot of pressure, it just is what it is.

I've let my running go for the last two weeks and that is a source of stress for me right now too. Sad that the thing I love so much is stressing me out but it is. I haven't been running but honestly I think that I really need the rest right now. I want to get back to it as soon as possible. I have a race coming up next month for 9/11 that I'm really looking forward to. So running will be back.

My time off from work has been good. I've been knitting which is one of the things that I haven't been doing but missed greatly. My house is clean and organized again...something it hasn't been in a long time. All the laundry is done and folded and put away! It hasn't been that way in a very long time. I've been doing OK but as my time off draws to a close and I have to face going back to work, I am afraid. I'm nervous about going back. But I think I'm ready. I hope.

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